Thursday, December 18, 2008

Falling Scales

Dear Answer Phone:
What is the image that people intend to invoke when they say that the scales fall from their eyes?

To suggest a realization or the ability to see through an illusion, literate folks are wont to say that "the scales fell from my eyes and I saw clearly." You can tell that they are literate folk because they use the adverbial but unnecessary "clearly" over the more pleasant and familiar "clear." You can tell that they are obfuscatory by their nature and not to be trusted.

As a result, try to avoid getting sucked into their etymology and sentence parsing duels, such as identifying the source or actual visual representation intended by the Saw of the Falling Scales.

It does not benefit you. Do your best not to grow agitated with the possible meanings of scales. Do not think on a hefty Scales-of-Justice type vintage weight measuring device somehow balanced on the bridge of ones nose, all vision occluding until it clatters onto your toes spilling whatever ancient commodity it was in the process of portioning. Do not think of that awkward and silly metaphor.

Do not imagine the unpalatably gross image of fish skin coating your ocular cavity, hopefully freshly cut from the fish so they are not too smelly, but thus certainly uncomfortably slimy. It would be to your disadvantage with this word bourgeoisie with which you tarry to try to figure out why one would assent to have the scales placed there in the first place, although some argument about an omega-3 face mask does seem plausible.

And the worst possibility is to get geometrical with this syllabic sybarite. To even consider how the ratio of a map distance to a real distance might ever prevent one from seeing some later realized truth is going to lead you into some creepy math fantasy land.

So, dear inquisitor, I tell you now that should someone tell you that they scales have fallen from their eyes, they are begging you to punch them in the spleen until they come to their senses and talk normal.

No comments:

Post a Comment